Updated: Aug 5, 2020
"A gun would be too violent. A noose would be too ancient. And a knife blade to the wrist would be too silent. So, the question became, How could a once-glorious life be ended swiftly and precisely, with minimum mess yet maximum impact?" - The 5 AM Club, Robin Sharma
10th Jan 2020, I chose the ancient and now that I look back, I'm glad I failed at the attempt. I won't get into specifics of how I got into that state which led me to perform the dangerous deed, but I'm sure a lot of you would've had the thought.
I know how it feels in that state, you feel paralyzed even though all your body parts are working perfectly well. All you can think about is how to get rid of the pain that seems like it will never end. And the only way to relieve yourself from the pain seems to be the dangerous deed. If are not able to get rid of the pain, our mind wants to get rid of ourselves.
12th March 2020, lockdown/quarantine started due to covid 19, I still dint know how to live, but one thing was sure, dying wasn't an option. So I decided to change my lifestyle. Before the attempt, I was a weed addict and heavy smoker, most of my free time was wasted around smoke. I wanted to change that, so I stopped consuming all forms of smoke, and used that time with learning new things. Started off with cooking healthy meals so that I could detox and start becoming fit. Made sure I did one hour of workout every single day.
Weeks went by without major results, but I was determined to improve. I started taking pictures of my body everyday, so I could see improvement. And after sometime I could clearly see it.
Then there was no stopping me. I bought an acoustic guitar because of my love for music. Started singing songs within a week. A month passed and I got an electric guitar. Now I'm trying to become a one man band, playing guitar, drums, Cajun, flute and singing. Will add a few more instruments over time.
Posting all activities I do in a day, to inspire people and show them that if you believe in yourself, there is a way out. Do follow me on Instagram and Facebook for daily updates.
Our mind is trained to make excuses. You'll be able to make a 1000 excuses to not do something, but all you need is 1 reason to improve, to live. A reason that is so strong, that it doesn't let you sleep, it doesn't let you chill. All you need is that 1 reason to succeed.
And once you have that, you will automatically fix your entire lifestyle to achieve all your goals. You'll start enjoying every single day of your life. So never lose hope. Battle on.